The Problem With Motivation (and how to fix that).
I can have all the motivation in the world to do a thing…and then I can surf Netflix and binge watch all of The Witcher and tell myself looking at Geralt’s butt in those tight pants is motivating me. Geek problems. So what is motivation anyway or lack there of?
By definition it is the general desire to do something, right? Here is the problem. I honestly can’t recall a single time in my life I had the desire to workout. I know, shocking. Let me explain. I was a ballet dancer for 12 years and then I turned to soccer. I know, that was a neat twist. I ran all over, got in shape and spent countless hours doing drills and yes, was even on the varsity team back in the day, but I did it because I really wanted it.
In January, everyone is trying to convince others to exercise, eat right, do this and that. Maybe you even feel the pressure to lose weight. I need to ask you this question. What do you actually want? For me, I want exercise to be fun.
I also want my arms to look decent in tank tops and not wave goodbye to people and have my arm continue on with waving underneath.
I have been in all various states of shape. The days are long gone when I could roll up at Taco Bell and eat whatever I want and lose weight. I don’t even know that metabolism anymore.
Right now, I know that I do NOT feel good mentally and physically. I know what I do NOT want. And that’s a start. So if you are there with me, let’s take a look at what we can do.
Action tells the thoughts in our heads that we are in control. What actions can you take right now that can help you?
- Small actions. Start today with cleaning a space to workout if that’s your goal. If your goal is to write the great novel, start writing a chapter. But write down smaller actions you can take, and then do them starting today.
- Reward yourself. I got in the habit of sitting with my dogs and reading and doing pretty much nothing over the Christmas break because I told myself I was resting. I have now basically told my books, look guys, I’ll be back at the end of the day and you will be my reward for getting stuff done. I keep them away from me during the day so I don’t sit and just do nothing…but I use them as my reward for getting stuff done.
- Two choices. I keep giving myself too many options. I have a list of workouts I want to do, and that actually isn’t helping me. I am going to start the one I think I will finish and stick to…plus it’s fun. So I am not going to kill myself because there’s a workout I did before, and I know I can’t hardly walk after leg day so I have been avoiding it and that really isn’t helping, and I have a back-up plan.
- Stop comparing yourself even to past you. This year’s me is pissed because 2017 me was doing great. First of all, we didn’t have the pandemic. I had my kids home and believe it or not, that makes a difference in my mental state. I have to realize that I am not mentally in the same place now that I am an empty-nester. I don’t know exactly how to get back to myself…and that has been a ridiculous mind game because they can still be proud of me even though they aren’t here. When they come back for the summer, I need to realize I won’t be all out of shape and we can do family stuff again.
- Excuses. I am not getting back into the dating pool, I am married, but if your excuse was that Jason Momoa wasn’t single and now he is back out there, you know, knock yourself out. My excuses are that it’s cold. It’s Monday. It’s Tuesday. Betty White died (that is sad ya’ll). But my mind is ridiculous. Really and truly so as long as the day is long, I can come up with reasons not to start today and that is why I have to start no matter what. The excuses are not real, true or useful.
- Be patient. Once you start, it’s easier to keep going. Remember results on anything are not instant. I am going to start and just keep going. I have to do it for my own health because it is important and YOU are your best advocate.
Sometimes people aren’t there to help you, they are there to get you off your game. Don’t forget that if you ask a friend to help you, and they can’t walk with you, or go with you one day, it’s okay to go by yourself. If you do need help, phone someone who is more likely to call you out on your B.S. It helps. Trust me I am great at doing that for others and I am going to start doing that for myself now.
I’d love to have you join us in the Club if you need motivation to change your mindset. You’ve got this!
- 10 Thinking Sins
- 5 Things that Cause us to Lose Hope in Ourselves
- Lies that Keep You From Moving Forward