5 Ways to Stop Sabotaging Your Life
There are many times we get in our own way. Each of us has our own stories to tell and our own problems; however does that make it any easier to deal with in the moment?
Finances, frustration at your job, feeling powerless over losing weight, blaming yourself for not going to the gym, replaying that argument over and over, procrastinating and then agonizing at last-minute woes…the list goes on and on. Truly. Think for just a second at something you need help with in your life right now. Now think to yourself, how have I tried to solve this problem lately? And how have I made it worse?
No blame. No judgment. Just be honest with yourself right now. Take a deep breath. Have you made a plan to help yourself out of this situation or are you stuck in a loop? Chances are, you are mid-loop right this very minute. I was once there as well. Note, if you suffer from health issues, here is my note about the time I was stuck. << you can circle back around to this.
As I found my way out of my loop, I would like to help you make your way out as well. But I can only be your guide. I know that you have thought to yourself at least once before that you might be your own worst enemy, so let’s get you to be your own best advocate for change.
5 Ways to Stop the Sabotage:
- Identify the habit and the trigger that causes it to continue. Do you have a behavior you are trying to change? Mine was dropping the need for sugar, gluten and inflammatory foods as well as not putting yoga on the back burner. If I woke up and it was cold, I had a habit of shutting down because I knew that cold made my joints hurt. If I had a bad day, I wanted cookies. None of this was serving the new me. I was trapped in the pattern of “comfort food” which did NOT comfort. Where did it come from? The women in my family cooked and used food as a way to help themselves. Only it never actually helped. NOT a single person had ever used exercise, getting outside or doing something different to heal. Hmm.
- After you have found your why, work on your HOW! I knew why I did this. It was evident that I had surrounded myself with people who literally loved to complain and not change a damn thing. Excuses were the preferred method of “change”. If you take an inventory around you, who do you spend most of your time with? That might need to change. If you answered yourself, that still might need to change. But tread carefully. The energy of others truly has the power to propel you forward or drag you down. I let go of people who didn’t have the capacity to change.
- Create the boundaries you need right now. Finances. What are you spending your money on? What is a non-negotiable in that area? Food. What are you eating like currently? What can you change? What can you let go of? People. Who lifts you up? Who drags you down? What things can be put on your list of keep, and what can put on your list of I need some boundaries over here <<< like pronto! Refer to linked word later to help you with boundaries. Get paper and pen or your journal and write this down. It is not enough to say it out loud.
- Keep goals in front of you…on your planner or calendar. One way to get to the gym or yoga is to put it in front of you. Make a date. Schedule the event. Enact change in your life. Get serious about this. Put a list on your fridge if you want to plan out meals, and clear away what you don’t need. Be purposeful in your thoughts and deeds.
- Stay in the present! Lastly, if you made a mistake yesterday, please, please let it go. As I read once, if you get a flat tire, you fix it. You don’t slash the other four. So don’t say to yourself, damn. That cupcake jumped in my mouth. I might as well eat one daily now. I will start over next week. Cheat days do not work…seriously. They turn into cheat weeks, which turn into cheat months. You get my drift because you have done this. Journal it out. Let it go. Stay in the present. Make a I forgive myself list nightly and wake up to your affirmation of “I will have a great day today.” Then proceed to act as if the best news ever will be heard today. You can do this. I believe in you because I was once where you are.
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