5 tips to Make Life Easier
I make it a habit to read and respond to everyone personally while I still can on my Facebook Fan Page. There used to be 80 fans, and while I am approaching 80,000 on the page, this blog is where the meat is. Someone said “If only it were that F-word easy” on one of my posters the other day. Here is the interesting thing…it can be that F-word easy. It can.
However, I have to tell you angry sister, I do understand you. I would love for you to read my about me here or my early posts about going to the doctor’s every week, but I am personally not going back there right now. I understand commenting from a place of pain. I do. I understand sitting on the couch with tears running down your face because the physical pain is wearing you down mentally. And as hard as it is, let’s get up, out of our pajamas, as I tell you on my videos, and make a damn plan. If you do the little things first and get them out-of-the-way, we can tackle the big things later.
5 Tips to Make Life Easier:
- Let go of yesterday’s pain. Emotionally, you might have spoken from a place of pain or anger. Make yourself a cup of tea, and if you can fix whatever happened, set about making it right. If not, let go. Light a candle, put on your favorite music, and sit down and visualize your best self. It is somewhat like meditation, but I do this with my own pain. I visualize that it is gone and in its place is the best version of me possible. I have had help with this process, because I also journal the best version of myself and how I want to feel. It does help me release the feelings that are residual from 18 years of pain. I mean come on; I didn’t think it was ever going to be like pressing the easy button.
- Do not, in any way shape or form, revert to victim mentality if you can help it. What I mean here is don’t feel sorry for yourself or blame others. I am purely talking about taking back control from those you have given your power too. I understand the suffering of pain. As we search for a way to protect ourselves from it, we climb deeper inside and cling to it being something that has happened to us. Instead of embracing it as something that is currently part of us. Once we name this fear, pain, anger and recognize that it really is part of us right now, we can learn to shift away from it as a feeling we don’t want to feel right now. That is what I did with my pain. I used yoga to shift away even as I embraced the pain of the movements. To further explain, here is what I did. I could not hold down dog at first. The pain in my wrists was so great that I would inwardly berate myself at first. I focused on the pain. As I learned to shift from that to the breath, I began to have a revelation. The pain would lessen if only for a bit. By the end of my 200-hour yoga teacher training, the pain was a dull ache in my lower back and shoulders, where it had been a raging inferno consuming me before my journey.
- Get stronger. This can be mentally, physically, and spiritually. Really, it can be done. I had every uplifting book known to man. I had CD’s. I despised all those people. Yup. I did. Until I realized that wasn’t going to change my situation. They were not to blame because they were able to get over x, y, z that they wrote about (insert what is causing you to feel weak). I decided that I needed to be stronger. I wrote more in my journal about what I wanted to feel. I continued my yoga practice, and I surrounded myself with the types of people I needed in my life. The ones doing the exact same thing I was. MOVING on.
- Find the right people to lift you up. This has to be next, because I have written about moving past the energy vampires before. You can’t expect to move on without any energy. If you have people taking, taking, taking, maybe a tiny give back to keep you there, but then taking, taking, taking again. It’s time to create that distance I have spoken of. Start getting to exercise class if it’s for you, or paint nights. Meditation groups, yoga, or anything that does not include talking about your pain and suffering. Leave that for your counselor. Move on with your friends. Does that mean you can’t ever talk about it? No. It doesn’t. But look at what you are trying to become and step into it completely, so you have a fighting chance.
- Be consistent in your steps. If at all possible, don’t revert back to “Woe is me.” Do I do that sometimes? Hell yes. Then I call a friend and say “Slap me like in Moonstruck if I say…” then we go on about our day. I also try to do that for my clients as well. Ermm, not the slapping part. But I tell them the truth. The truth is so hard sometimes, but I say it anyway. Always. Because I want to be consistent in my steps and part of that is owning my truth and knowing when I have started slipping backwards. It is important to continue on the journey forward with slow and steady steps, if need be, but at least I am making progress.
Dear friends, do you need more help? Each month we work on raising our vibrations in the Head|Heart|Health Club. I would love to have you join us!