How To Release Yourself from Your Past: 7 Tested Ways

Guest post by: Zane Baker

How To Release Yourself from Your Past: 7 Tested Ways

Who doesn’t have a past?

That’s the million dollar question!

Each one of us has a past. Most likely you have experienced your fair share of wonderful memories and very exciting moments that you are bound to keep with you for eternity.

However, you’ve also likely been through situations that were not only challenging, but also full of pain and heartache.

In this regard, there are some aspects of your past that were particularly difficult, which is very common.

You may, therefore, find yourself feeling guilty about some of the things you have said, done or failed to do.

If you want to move on, away from such painful memories, then you have to put the past behind you.

To succeed, you must put lots of effort and hard work.  This is important because it is impossible to have any healthy or effective relationship with yourself or with others if you are living in the past.

You must, therefore, make some concerted effort to not only focus on the now and here, but also on the future that you are keen on creating.  You do that by immediately making the decision to leave your past behind and take the necessary steps and start living in the present.

In doing so, you will, without a doubt, notice that your confidence will soar and you will also experience healthier and happier relationships which will not only bring great rewards to your life but also to your loved ones and those that you closely associate with.

To help you succeed in this important endeavor, here are some important tips on how to release yourself from your past: 7 tested ways.

Lets begin:

1. Don’t deny your past

The first and the most important step you should take is to accept your past. You must be able to face up to the past and acknowledge whatever happened. It is unwise to pretend that nothing happened or hope that you shall after some time forget whatever transpired. This though should not be mistaken to mean that you have to dwell constantly on it, to the contrary, you should not continuously blame yourself over it. You should make sure though that you take your lessons from that particular experience and view it as a learning experience.

2. Don’t underestimate your achievements

Always keep in mind that whenever you spend an inordinate amount of time regretting your past, you are continuously diminishing and ignoring all the positive achievements that you have made or attained during the same period and in the present. This is mainly because you are giving recognition and credit only to your past mistakes. You should ensure that you constantly and consistently focus on your achievements and not solely on your mistakes. Focusing on your mistakes not only makes them bigger but also gives them the power to control your life as well as your actions. To assist you in this task, you can make a point of writing down your achievements on a piece of paper or notebook, and when you are feeling low or overwhelmed, you can quickly go through them and get some encouragement.

3. Don’t miss or forget the lessons learned from your past mistakes

Unfortunately, for many of us, our mistakes are how we constantly tend to define ourselves. In this regard, it is vital that we keep on reminding ourselves that our mistakes aren’t who we are. However, it is important to pick the lessons you have learned from past experiences. However, positive or negative the experience may be. You should be fully aware that life generally tests us first and then teaches us the requisite lessons later. Your mistakes are part of the learning process in life and should be considered as such. Make sure you use the messages in your past to construct a future that’s not only happy and rich but also successful. As one writer aptly puts it, “A man’s mistakes are his portals of discovery.”

4. Avoid negative thoughts or cynicism

When something goes wrong, we always tend to take a more catastrophic way of thinking, often feeling or thinking that a single bad experience implies that our whole life is in shambles and completely ruined. However, nothing could be further from the truth. No matter what goes wrong, always keep in mind that you have the innate strength and ability to rebuild your life and get back on the right track. Even though it is true that you cannot be devoid of negative thoughts, always make a point of challenging any negative thoughts that pop up.

5. Learn to forgive so that you can move forward

Many times, we tend to hold ourselves hostage by failing to not only forgive ourselves for past indiscretions. These indiscretions may have been caused by us or brought upon us by other people. To move forward, you must let go of the pain and hurt that’s been holding you back. By learning to forgive, you will be able to move freely ahead without any hindrances whatsoever as your mind will be free of the baggage that such negative feelings tend to bring about. As a matter of fact, forgiving any past transgressions does you more good than anyone else. Learn to let go so that you can live freely and be able to channel your positive energy and thoughts to some other important aspects of your life.

6. Seek support whenever necessary

No man or a woman is an island. We all need support from time to time; this is especially so if you are facing a difficult past. The support you seek may come in different forms; you can get support from close friends and family members or seek professional help to assist you in working through your past and releasing the negative thoughts and feelings. Always keep in mind that seeking support and help is not a sign of weakness. On the contrary, this is a sign of great strength since it shows that you appreciate and know that you need to reach out to others for some assistance.

7. Use your past mistakes to assist others

All of us have things in our past that make us feel low and ashamed from time to time. Don’t let these feelings keep you from forging a new future. As many people will acknowledge, one of the best ways or methods of getting over an issue or a problem is to share your experience with others. You should use your past experiences to assist others who find themselves in similar situations. Using what you are ashamed of to help others is without doubt one of the most effective ways of not helping others tackle the problem at hand but also strengthening your resolve to be a better person in the future.

In conclusion, by applying the tips mentioned above, it is possible to let go of your past successfully.

It does though demand some effort and focus on your part, but it can be done since you have the innate power inside you to embrace a new beginning and start your life afresh.

I hope you enjoyed this article! Please share the knowledge and help a fellow friend or family member benefit from this article.

Till we meet again, have a fabulous day!

With Love,
Zane

Zane Baker is a Master Success Coach & Inspirational Speaker.  He’s also the Co-Founder of The Valhalla Mind Institute & The My Daily Zen Transformational Programs.  Zane serves over 150 thousand subscribers & followers with his free newsletter & personal growth advice on his Facebook page.  His top rated meditation track is available here “The Vision Quest”.  And you can visit his blog at www.ValhallaMind.com

5 Tips for Setting Clear Boundaries Today!

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Did you ever look back on a relationship or friendship and think to yourself that the signs were there all along?  You were so busy making excuses in your head for the other person that your space, your wants and needs, were clearly being victimized over and over again.  It could even happen at work.  I was once NOT a master at setting boundaries.  I had clients who walked all over me, and messaged me morning, noon and night…like right as I sat down to have time with my family.

I would see the blinking phone light and then see who it was and always be prompt with answering them.  I valued my great customer service as I had the highest number of clients in my business group at one time other than the person above me making 10 times what I made.  But for me, it was about building good relationships.  While I still believe in great customer service and value my clients, I recognized that I let people drain me both physically and mentally in my life.  It was time to put an end to what I was letting happen TO me, and take control so that I could make things better FOR me.

How did I start setting boundaries that were good for me?

  1. I looked at how it made me FEEL when these people didn’t value my time.  It was lots of people.  Friends, clients, and people who were part of my business.  What was the underlying reason I allowed this?  I realized that I let the other person’s “stuff” get to me like it was my own.  Interesting.  What made me a good listener was my empath skills and how I always put myself in the other person’s shoes…sometimes almost literally as I could feel so much more than they told me; however, this was not helping me help them.  I had to learn to separate myself from their feelings.
  2. I had to decide what my core values were and then recognize HOW this person was crossing them.  What matters most to me is honesty, and once I felt this boundary line in relationships being crossed or tested, I was able to see that it made me feel quite literally “sick” and used.  This feeling would come up immediately and I knew it was time to let that person know right then and there that they either weren’t telling me the whole truth, or they were flat-out lying.  It did lead to 2 friendships being severed that were draining…mostly because they were married, but not to each other, and things were getting out of hand with their stories.  I insist on trust in my marriage with my husband of 18 years, so naturally what they did made me feel “sick” again in my stomach.  It was a sign that I had been ignoring…but not anymore.
  3. I couldn’t change their actions…so I changed mine.  I didn’t want to keep repeating Einstein’s definition of insanity.  They kept treating me the same and I kept expecting different results.  The problem was, I was changing.  I was starting to see things clearly and see what I needed to do to surround myself with positive feelings.  Here’s the deal, the grandma who says the same things over and over, the co-worker who gossips about you all day long, the spouse who repeats the same behavior over and over, they aren’t going to suddenly change.  Why wait for what ifs and maybes.  Start putting up those clear lines by changing how you handle them.
  4. Decide clearly HOW you are going to set that boundary and WHAT will happen IF someone crosses the line.  In some cases, it’s only a matter of time before they do x,y,z that you mentioned you don’t like.  Stop.  Assess your feelings, and if you have told them in no uncertain terms not to do this, then it’s up to you on how you move forward.  I realize that people test this, but I am a person who doesn’t mind cutting off ties if it means that my emotional health is still in tact.  Boundaries are all about your needs, and not the other person.  Does this sound hard to do?  Not to me anymore.  Here is why, I had gotten so sick and so drained from trying to take care of everyone at once that I wasn’t able to take care of myself any longer at all.  For me, it was really about living a healthy life again.  I simply had nothing left to give these people who were taking.  I knew that my boundaries were deep inside of me and attached to who I was and that every time I let someone walk all over them, they were showing me that they didn’t value me at all.
  5. I had to mean exactly what I said and then, in order to move forward, I had to let go of any feelings of guilt. I had to get grounded so that I wasn’t made to feel like it was my fault.  Clearly, you need respect in any relationship.  My emotions were valid for me.  It was not about them as I simply had to take care of myself.  Sure we are sometimes afraid of telling people the truth, but if you do, and the other person sends you a hate filled e-mail or writes about how THEY would deal with that situation, or even worse, tries to change your feelings like you can’t and aren’t allowed to feel the way you do, well it’s bye-bye time for me.  They don’t see me again for many years. Trust me when I tell you that it was hard at first, but has gotten to the point now where I can tell who is going to test this, and who is going to respect this.  I have to ground myself daily, and I can’t go into the space where the negative energy lies.  It serves no purpose and I know what my purpose is.  It is really and truly to help others move forward.  

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If Life was Like Game of Thrones…

Hey there geeks and geekettes.  So I was minding my own business while daydreaming about Jon Snow nothing, and this thought popped into my mind.  What if life was like Game of Thrones?  I wasn’t sure where this line of thought was going to take me…so I explored it naturally.  Here are a few things that might happen if this line of reasoning were true in life:

  1. That guy who just cut you off in traffic and then made a rude gesture out the window, well, a few miles down the road, you passed his car on fire because Drogon instinctively knew the Mother of Dragons was pissed.  What? So instead of saying something rude and getting all mad, you accidentally said the command to call him under your breath.  It’s easy to utter.
  2. When that guy who sits on the Iron Throne calls you into work because Varys whispered you weren’t really using your sick days properly, you know because Varys was stalking your Instagram account and saw you out so he told everyone, you tell Varys that he has to take a message over to your bud Ramsay’s house.  Problem solved.
  3. A staff meeting is called and that one annoying co-worker, you know, the one who sneaks in late daily through the back door, never takes a day of sick leave, but can’t be found during the day, the one who shows up on “Pot Luck” day saying “Oh man, I forgot that was today!”, but eats all the food, you know that one, well, when they ask you where the meeting is, you tell them to go through that door on the right up ahead…and drat.  Someone left the moon door open.  Oops!
  4. You go to ask your boss a question, but see that fake Petyr Baelish coming out of his office and the next thing you know you are being transferred to a remote location like you came up with the idea.  What just happened?
  5. Luckily for you, while you are pondering the absurdity of this, a mysterious e-mail comes in with photos of your boss and wait, isn’t that some guy named Loras from the copy room?  Interesting.  You decide to blackmail your boss and now you have a room with a view.  Petyr is now being transferred.
  6. The CEO makes a surprise visit and is one of the most cunningly shrewd people you have ever met.  You try hard not to call him an “Angry Elf” and you feel like you’ve heard that line somewhere before, but nevertheless Tyrion took a liking to your style…especially since he somehow already knew you blackmailed the boss.  He asks you to work for him immediately.
  7. While working for your new boss, you discover someone trying to pilfer from the monthly coffee and snack collection funds.  You let him know and he tells you to assign that person to a new outpost…beyond the wall.
  8. You think your new boss drinks too much…during the day.  But you understand.  You met his sister once and she would drive you to drink as well.  You shrug and just get to the liquor store like he asked you…after all, you don’t want to be late with his breakfast.
  9. You start to feel like you are being followed, and when you look behind you, you notice a really large woman.  You think nothing of it, but decide to run around the corner anyway just to see what happens.  As you duck behind a trashcan, the large woman shouts out that she was sent to protect you.  Considering the way things have been going…she might be telling the truth, but just in case she isn’t, you snap a photo of her and post it on FB to everyone you know saying “Who is this crazy lady?”  You can’t be bothered calling the police.  Asking your social network is probably safer.

Check out this cool quiz to see who you played in this story!  Which Game of Thrones Character Are You?

Aimee’s note: these are ramblings of a writer who works with 3 dachshunds so no reference to your real life boss is actually reflected.  But always ask yourself “What would Tyrion do?”…

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When An Empath Loves A Narcissist: The Lure Of The Broken Soul

Guest post by Steve Waller

When An Empath Loves A Narcissist: The Lure Of The Broken Soul

They occupy opposite ends of the love spectrum, but empaths and narcissists often find themselves coupled up in unlikely relationships. But why? What is it that attracts one to the other?

This article will focus mainly on why empaths find themselves pulled towards narcissists, how they get trapped, and what they have to do to escape.

What The Empath Sees

Gifted with the ability to sense the underlying emotions and feelings of others, an empath is uniquely placed to see into the depths of a narcissist’s being to the wounded, unhappy soul that resides there.

Upon discovering this pained creature, the instinctual response of the empath is to try to help, heal, and love them.

Before they know it, they become entangled with this narcissist and the toxic relationship begins.

How They Get Sucked In

Narcissists can, when required, display copious amounts of charm and charisma. You might think that empaths would be less susceptible to this artificial persona, but it is precisely because they are beings of love that they wish to see the best in everyone.

They can sense the pain that is hidden behind the smile and the wit, while, at the same time, believing that this act is some sort of suppressed character trying to assert control. They think that they can help free it through their care and affection.

They envisage a time in the future when this narcissistic individual can become a changed person, cured of all their bad traits and free from pain. Once they believe in this possibility, they feel compelled to try to make it a reality.

What Stops Them Leaving

It won’t be too long before an empath begins to regret their decision to get involved with the narcissist. The person they initially fall for will quickly disappear, revealing the true nature of the beast.

The empath will shower love and kindness on the narcissist – to the point where it turns into adoration – in an attempt to purge the pain from them and soothe their damaged spirit.

But to the narcissist, this sort of attention is like a drug; they simply can’t get enough of it. And unfortunately for the empath, it only serves to reinforce the egoistic self-adulation.

Then comes the game playing and manipulation. To maintain their air of superiority, a narcissist will seek to control every situation involving their empath partner. They will use destructive and demeaning language to tear them apart, piece by piece, until they can exert their utter dominance.

In spite of all their good intentions, the empath will find themselves in a trap; one of loving a person who is incapable of caring for them, let alone showing love back.

But they aren’t yet aware of this trap; they continue to seek the narcissist’s affection in a vain attempt to mend the broken heart they see before them. They struggle to understand what is happening to them because, from their position, the behavior of their partner is utterly incomprehensible.

What happens next is quite possibly the most damaging aspect of the whole process: the empath looks at all of the pain and trauma now filling their life and pins the blame squarely on themselves.

Rather than accept that the narcissist is the cause of all their misery like they should, they insist that it is they who have failed. They wrongly believe that all the conflict and resentment in the relationship is their fault; that they somehow didn’t try hard enough to rid their lover of the pain they endure.

From this self-blame grows an unwillingness to do what is required; to break up with their narcissist partner. They proceed to lock themselves in their own prison by forfeiting their right to be happy. They insist that to do so would only heap more misery on the already tormented soul they have such affection for.

How They Finally Break Free

There is only one method of escape for the empath and that is to fully open their eyes to the situation they are in. In order to make a break for freedom, they must first understand that the original lure of the narcissist was misguided.

They must realize that it is nobody’s duty to fix another; that they have no responsibility to stay with their partner any longer. They must accept that whether the narcissist will ever change is not something they have any say in; they can only captain their own ship and it’s time to choose a different course.

This will not, by any means, be the last they hear from the narcissist. In an all-out bid to regain what they see as a possession, they will declare their undying love for the empath, swear they have changed, and make many promises that they know they cannot keep.

They will turn the charm back on and, for a while, the empath may see some of what they initially found so appealing. But if the empath can hold their nerve during this period, the narcissist will eventually unleash a barrage of malicious words and actions in a desperate attempt to pull their victim back in. This can be extremely difficult to endure and it can seem like the whole world is crashing down around you, but you must hold firm.

Leaving a narcissist isn’t the end of the story for the empath; it will take a long time for them to put the pieces of their life back together and even longer to regain their faith in the goodness of other people. But they will have broken the bond that so often draws empaths and narcissists together.

Are you an empath who has been through such a trial? Leave a comment below and share you thoughts and experiences.

Just for fun, take this quick quiz.

Steve WallerSteve Waller is the founder of A Conscious Rethink – a growing voice in the world of mind, body and spirit. He has benefitted greatly from self-help books and other aspects of the personal development movement, and now wants to share some of his knowledge and wisdom with those who need it. His Facebook page reaches millions of people each week with its mix of inspirational quotes, motivational videos, and helpful articles.

5 Tips for Developing Healthy Relationships Today!

I took a quick poll last week about the topics that my readers wanted to hear more about and this was one of the top three!  So to clarify for everyone out there, relationships don’t have to be romantic; however, I have been married for 18 years and this year marks year 20 with my college sweetheart.  My best-friend from elementary school and I have been friends for almost as old as I am…which is to say a long time.  Additionally, I have the greatest group of girlfriends who meet on a regular basis and are not afraid to let vulnerability be discussed.  Has it always been this way?  Heck no!!  All of the above relationships have been through some twists and turns, but I did pick up a few tips along the way.

5 Tips for Developing Healthy Relationships Today:

  1. Open lines of communication are the number one tip that I have for you today, and that includes the “trust factor”.  If you don’t trust your partner, your friends, or your family, how are you going to be open?  You aren’t.  You will always hold part of yourself back and that could even border on holding back the truth which will further work to damage the trust.  I had a friend for a number of years who I genuinely cared about; however, that being said, each and every time we talked she would hide things or craft some sort of story that never seemed to be quite the truth.  Time after time things were missing in our conversations.  I ignored these signs, until one day I simply could not.  The trust factor has to be there or the relationship will not be able to move forward.
  2. You have to be able to accept criticism that is honest and meant to help you grow.  That being said, if this criticism comes from a harsh argument, it will not be effective at all.  Moreover, you should develop active or reflective listening.  In active listening, we are genuinely interested in understanding what the other person is thinking, feeling, wanting, or what the message means, and we are able to process this as a type of feedback.  This is hard.  It is.  But I have seen it done with my group of girlfriends.  One of them recently went through a divorce and has developed this skill through that process.  She brings questions to the table about things and genuinely wants to know what we all think or how we feel.  It has strengthened our friendship whereas before, she did not want to listen to advice before as it was painful to her.  She is really trying hard to separate fact from feeling as she actively listens to our advice about whatever she is asking.  It also helps that we are not giving her unsolicited advice.  We are all there to lift her up.
  3. Develop and hone in on your compassion and empathy.  Remember how I dislike the word judge?  Icky.  It makes us feel like we are on trial; however, there is a thing called discernment and that is different.  We become aware of the emotional response and might know what triggers our friends, partners and family members.  We then try to come at it from a place of compassion.  We are more open and connected to what is going on this way and can tap into our inner intuition about what is really at the root of a problem.  This saves us.  It reminds us to speak from love.
  4. Remember to have boundaries.  It is important to remember how to separate your feelings from that of your friends and partners.  Likewise, it is important to know you can’t heal them emotionally.  That is their job and not yours.  One of my favorite memes recently has the little guy holding the jar of happiness and his friend comes over and says “Where did you get that?”  And little guy says “I made it myself.” BOOM!  Microphone drops.  Have boundaries on your emotions before they get drained.
  5. Make time for the relationship…that isn’t on technology.  The phones.  The phones.  They are everywhere.  When trying to communicate they are a distraction.  Make time by shutting off the technology and creating a sacred space for you to unwind and be real.  This can be weekly, or monthly depending on your schedule, but try to get outside as well and enjoy some much-needed fresh air with your friend or loved one.  It’s not only a lifesaver…but a relationship saver as well.

FriendshipWant to know more about how to journal yourself to a better you?  Read more under 4 Weeks to Wellness.

3 Tips for Heart-centered Living

What does it mean to be heart-centered anyway?  Well, you have heard that your heart wants one thing, but your brain wants another before.  So let’s take a moment to examine that.  The ego, or psyche sometimes thinks first and understands later.  I know that I have been guilty of that.  However, let’s suppose for a moment that you start to really focus within and you see past the surface.  It takes a while to get used to pausing without reacting or speaking first, and learning to express from your heart, but it really can be done.

As we start to move from fear-based thinking to love-based living, the world expands.  Fear tends to shrink our environment and make us less likely to step out of that comfort zone, and love, well, love helps us do amazing things.  I am not just talking about love for others though…this part is important.  You definitely need to practice self-love and forgiveness of your own faults.  It is not selfish to put self-care into place.  So many times my clients have to step into their own beauty and realize that their oxygen mask has to be put on first.  But no one can make another person do that…it is within them to see that they need to give themselves permission to be human and practice compassion for themselves.  We don’t have to be last.  It it is crucial to realize this.  As you learn this truth, everything else falls into place.

3 tips for heart-centered living:

  1. Stop and breathe.  Are you having a heart-centered reaction or are you so busy in your head that things have quickly gone from A to Z?  Take three deep breaths, and if you are at a desk, sit up straight and tall elongating your spine and square your shoulders up and then gently bring the shoulder blades down your back.  Place the hands in your lap palms facing upwards.  Practice: Apana Vayu Mudra-The Mudra of the Heart by folding your middle and ring fingers towards the palm in such a way that they touch the tip of the thumb.  Fold the index finger inward allowing it to touch the base of the thumb.  The small finger should be stretched outward.  Keep your eyes closed and hold the mudra as long as you want to.  This mudra actually improves blood circulation to your heart.
  2. Practice compassion.  As we start to focus inwards, we realize that we have to live with compassion for ourselves and others.  We are all human going about our day in similar ways all around the world.  While we live in different places, have different lifestyles, ultimately, we want the best human experience we can have on this planet and hopefully leave it a better place.  So the struggles that involve the people we interact with on a daily basis do have some effect on us.  Practice: How are you being with people?  Look to the 4 A’s.  Attention, appreciation, admiration, and affection.  Are you open to whatever it is they have to say?  Reflect on your body language as well.  Tight jaw, tense shoulders.  Relax and open up your heart. 
  3. Live with passion.  Picture what you love doing, who you love being with, what stirs up your passion and fulfills you.  Practice: Get out your journal.  Write about what you would do if you didn’t have to worry about money?   If doubt creeps in write this instead: “I am enough, worthy, and deserving of following my passion.  I am strengthened by doing the things I love to do.  I am now living my heart-centered calling.”

Remind yourself throughout the day by touching your heart, practicing the mudra or even saying “Am I living through my heart right now or my head?”  These pauses in what we act on truly do make a difference when we don’t react right away.  Continue journaling about your passion and living through the heart.  I actually use this one every night:

Plain Blue Journal

To learn more about my new journal guide as part of my 4 Weeks to Wellness program, click here.follow heart

Get What You Want in Life with These 5 Steps

Did you know that our thoughts really and truly shape our destiny?  I am sure by now you know that you have more power over your future than you give yourself credit in having.  Many people think that what happens next is out of their control.  I know that I was once one of those people when I was very ill.

I made it a habit to change my thoughts daily and it helped improve my life tremendously in many ways.  I still have to remind myself to keep focused on the positive and to constantly re-direct myself to the best possible things that could happen and not think of the worst.  It really is a work in progress daily, which is why I am inviting you to the One Minute a day challenge right now!

Each day I want you to think of one thing you want out of life.  Maybe it’s the same thing each day, but truly envision it, see it, smell it, and imagine what living like this would be like.  Next, I have these 5 tips for you to get what you want out of life.

5 Steps to Get What You Want Out of Life:

  1. Accept that you are in control of your life.  Your life equals your mistakes.  I know that you want to be able to blame your boss, your co-worker, maybe even someone else, but don’t.  Start living with the thought that you are in control and only what is good is coming your way.  This does not mean I am saying think your prayers aren’t heard if you pray…just don’t blame anyone else.  Know that what goes on in your head can be changed by you and you alone.
  2. Get clear on what you want.  Do you know what type of life you want?  Where you want to be in 3 years?  What you want your day to look like?  Get clear on everything you want to come into your life.  The good stuff only.  See the big picture!
  3. Live your truth.  I am not saying quit your job today; however, if it is not something that really ever made you happy, admit it.  What would it look like if you worked somewhere with people who made you happy?  What would your ideal job/boss/office type situation be like and what can you do to work towards it?  Be aware of your truths as you work and do what keeps you on your path right now so that you might have a chance to go down another path in the near future.
  4. Believe that it is possible.  This part is really key!  What does your belief system in yourself look like today?  Is it not very good?  Do you lack self-esteem?  Do you accept challenges or tend to shrink from them?  If going through a tough spot meant you could change your life, how would you react?  Just believe that you have the abilities to accomplish your dreams and keep on saying it.
  5. Act on your dreams!  When it comes time to do it, whatever it is, don’t back away from it because you are afraid it might not work.  We all have failures sometimes, but the leap of faith that we take to try to do the impossible encourages us and boosts our confidence for the next time something great comes along.  We can’t be afraid to say yes once again!

Ultimately, if you expect different outcomes for your future, you have to start thinking like it, acting like it, and changing your path.  Journaling is a powerful tool I use in my 4 Weeks to Wellness program and each day we work on one goal to get closer to what we want.  You really can get what you want out of life!

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9 tips on how to manage your iron overload disease.

9 tips on how to manage your iron overload disease…

This post will be dedicated to all of my new friends and friends I have yet to meet.  I can’t wait to get to my quote, but that’s my closing signature as you know.  So here it goes.  Let’s collect all of things we have learned and put them on one page.  I’m going to start because it’s my blog.  Onto your assignment.  If you have been diagnosed with Hereditary Hemochromatosis, you already know what’s wrong with you.  Hopefully, somewhere along the way someone explained what you should be doing, but if not, click the link above.  I am moving onto the next step.  Healing.  All of the bloggers I have recently met share a wealth of knowledge, but we are not doctors.  We are here as a support group for each other, so ask your doctor about any tips we share.  I am going to share some things that have taken me over 14 years to learn.  I don’t want you to wait that long.  If anyone has anything to add, please comment below.

  1. My joints ache.  What should I do?  Start taking a product with Glucosamine and Chondroitin like Relief.   I use the products I linked here, but you can use whatever works for you.  I personally know these have no fillers and no adverse side effects for my autoimmune disease as well.
  2. I am exhausted all the time.  What’s next?  After your ferritin has reached a good level (10 is nice), have your doctor check your vitamin D.  Seriously.  Why did it take 12 years to realize this?  I can’t be out in the sun for long.  This would make sense to check.  My favorite is this one called It’s Vital Minerals.
  3. I was taking a multi-vitamin.  What now?  Stay away from them!  Too much vitamin C is not needed as it promotes the absorption of iron and obviously we can’t take iron.  It was all Mr. Flintstones fault…if only we knew back then.  Find a vitamin with either low C or none added, and no added iron!
  4. I like raw seafood.  I heard I have to stay away.  This is true…to some degree.  Do not eat raw oysters ever due to Vibrio Vulnificus.  Thanks to one of my new blogger friends, I learned this word.  Honestly, no one ever told me why, just the get sick and die part.  Seriously.
  5. Drink more coffee.  Why?  Coffee is your life’s blood.  Ha.  Okay, so not really, but it does interfere with the absorption of iron.  Awesome.  We are Bi-winning now.
  6. Can I still drink gallons of sweet tea?  Okay, so I live in the south, and drink lots of tea.  My momma will even tell you she put it in my bottle.  No lie.  Please drink all the tea you want!  In fact, it also has magical properties if you drink the green tea version.  Would I fib?  Well, maybe not exactly magical per say, but it depends on your symptoms.  We are basing this off me.  While it does have a trace amount of ascorbic acid (vitamin C), it has selenium, which helps the thyroid.  This is important as iron has played with parts of my body I was not aware of.  That statement sounds a bit off…moving on.
  7. Prebiotics are good for your gut!!  If you are in maintenance phase and are de-ironed, add these chews to make your digestion better.  Prebiotics are fibers that support the growth of healthy probiotic bacteria in your digestive system.  Very important to heal your “gut” and to think about it as something that helps balance your whole system.
  8. Yay!  I am “normal” again.  Can I stop getting treatments?  No, you can’t.  Not unless you have a vampire living with you or you are into bloodletting with leeches.  Go every 4-6 months for life and you’ll be fine.  That is why my doctor has a house on the water and just added a library addition.  I wish I was kidding.  She could at least offer me a tour.
  9. Please get checked for diabetes, thyroid problems, heart disease, or pituitary issues should new symptoms occur.

This list will continue to grow and evolve as my readers share their knowledge.  If you found my blog through Facebook, welcome!  Please feel free to subscribe and share with your loved ones.  And now the part I like sharing best…one of my favorite quotes.

“Friendship is born at that moment when one person says to another, “What? You too? I thought I was the only one.”

~C.S. Lewis

3 Tips For Opening Your Heart Chakra.

Chakras.  What the heck does that word mean anyway and is it fake?  Well, a chakra is actually an energy center and more and more we are learning that there is proof to this whole “theory”.  So opening up your heart chakra is actually a good thing and honestly can’t hurt you.

An unhealthy or blocked heart chakra sometimes lends itself to behaviors such as being defensive, critical, controlling, suspicious, withdrawn, possessive and afraid to let go and release what is not good for you.  Sometimes elf-esteem issues or relationship problems lead to a weaker heart chakra connection.  What can we do to open it or strengthen it then?

3 Tips for Opening Your Heart Chakra:

  1. Visualize your heart opening up with a strong, clear green light filling your center.  Repeat “I am love.” and allow yourself to be at peace with this feeling.  Practice giving and accepting love unconditionally today.
  2. Stop clinging to the past hurt and allow yourself to forgive and step into the present moment.  Whatever happened, accept it and move on.  Say to yourself “I release this blockage of hurt.” and visualize it releasing from your body.  Breathe deeply and repeat your mantra of “I am love.”
  3. Practice a yoga pose to open your heart. Try camel pose. A blocked heart chakra often means a blocked throat chakra, too, and camel pose balances them both. Focus on elongating your lower back while focusing on the stretch and opening your upper back. If you click on the above link, you can watch Esther demonstrate and she doubles the mat for bad knees or use a towel.

Additionally for the heart chakra, wear green and visualize love and compassion surrounding you.  The green ties us to all living things around us so you can also sit outside and meditate on a nice day and take in the air to clear your body.  Remember, the heart chakra is only opened by your choice.  Choose to show yourself some love and forgiveness today.

Heart